Tuesday, 30 November 2021

A Variant Lawndale - Beach Party Invitation - Part 1

 Beach Party Invitation

Daria Morgendorffer approached the counter with trepidation. She didn’t know what the cafeteria staff were serving up today. “Uh! I hate it when the trays are wet,” Brittany Taylor said beside her.

 

“‘That which does not kill us makes us stronger,’" she said quoting Nietzsche.

 

“Is that from a song?” Brittany asked. “Hey, thanks for helping me out in Art.”

 

“No problem.”

 

“Maybe I could help you out in something.”

 

“Well, you could show me how to twirl hair around my little finger and look vacant,” Daria snarked.

 

Brittany did just that. “I don’t think that’s something you can teach. I know! You can come to my backyard beach party Saturday afternoon.”

 

“Backyard beach party?” Daria asked.

 

“Yes,” Brittany responded. “We had a pool with a wave machine put in. There is also a lot of sand around it, so it’s kind of like a beach!”

 

‘I see,” Daria said. ‘Of course, the Taylors would want of show off how wealthy they are!’

 

“But just this once of course.”

 

“Gee, Brittany. I'm overcome with emotion.”

 

“You need a napkin? Anyway, I promised the other cheerleaders that I wouldn't invite any more really attractive girls.”

 

“Now I'm especially flattered.”

 

 

Daria was still thinking about the invitation as she arrived at her friend Jane Lane’s house that afternoon. When she entered Jane’s room, she saw her friend looking through a sketchbook.

 

Life drawings? She didn’t know Jane did life drawings! She said so.

 

“I did them last summer. Want a look?”

 

“Sure.”

 

 

“You’re really bursting out of the picture plane here.”

 

“Yeah. That particular model was quite bursty. I think she had her bursts done.”

 

“Speaking of which,” Daria began, although she wasn’t sure of what Brittany’s deal was in that department.  “Brittany invited me to her party.”

 

“No kidding, are you going?”

 

“A backyard beach party? For teenagers? I’d rather swallow glass. Why? Do you want to go?”

 

“Oh, no, I'd much rather stay home and listen to my brother practice the opening to Come as You Are. I bet I could get some great sketches there...” Jane said.

 

“Well, I'm sure there'll be plenty of people posing. If you want to go, just make believe you're me. When you're popular, all unpopular people look alike anyway.”

 

Jane then pretended to be Daria, by wearing her glasses and speaking in a montone, but concluded that it wouldn’t work, as her face was too expressive.

 

 

Quinn Morgendorffer was looking through her clothes for something to wear to the party. Sure, it was three days away, but one didn’t leave such things to the last minute. She had already determined that she would need new swimming costumes. She held up a few skirts. “Sheer, semi-sheer, or opaque,” she mused. “Textured!” she decided.

 

“Isn’t one of you enough?” Daria asked from the door.

 

“Go away, I’m concentrating. I’m invited to a party Saturday afternoon and I have to choose the perfect outfits!”

 

“Countdown: only 66 more hours to go. Might this party be Brittany’s Backyard Beach Party?”

 

“Yes, and might you go away now?” Quinn stopped. Something didn’t add up. “Hey! How do you know about it?”

 

“I'm invited, too... but I haven't decided if I'll go,” Daria answered.

 

“You can’t go! You’ll ruin everything!”

 

“You know, I really should broaden my social horizons,” Daria said.

 

Quinn ran out of the room. “Mom! Dad! Daria is ruining my life again!

 

 

Helen Morgendorffer was annoyed at her daughters rivalry. She wondered if history was repeating, that Daria and Quinn would end up like her and her sisters. ‘Not if I have anything to say about it!’ she thought, not for the first time.

 

“Tell Daria she can't go to Brittany's party. My popularity is at stake,” Quinn said.

 

“Now, don't begrudge your sister a chance to expand her circle of friends,” Helen said.

 

“Maybe now she’ll have two,” Quinn commented.

 

“Touche, Quinn,” Daria responded.

 

“And don’t think that you’re confusing me with that French. You should ground her because… her room is a mess!”

 

‘That’s a stretch,’ Helen thought. Daria was the more organised of the two.

 

“If I go down for that one, I’m taking you with me,” Daria added.

 

“Wait!” Quinn interjected again. “Here’s something worse…” She started before she was interrupted again.

 

“Lawn gnomes going missing across Lawndale!” Jake said as he read from the paper.

 

Helen glared at him.

 

“Who would steal lawn gnomes?” Jake continued.

 

“Um, no idea,” Quinn said quickly and then gave a nervous laugh.

 

“Jake!” Helen said as Quinn laughed. She turned back to her daughters. “I think it’s great that you’re going to be spending time together. Dad and I would be happy to drive you to the party and pick you up.

 

“No!” they both said simultaneously.

 

“Thanks, but I’ll find some other way to get there,” Quinn said before leaving the kitchen.

 

“Daria, I’d like it if you would keep an eye on Quinn at this party.”

 

“I don’t know what I did, but it couldn’t have been that bad.”

 

“It's my way of saying if you won't do it, I'm sending you both with a babysitter.”

 

“I'll take that as a ringing declaration of parental approval.”

 

“Just the way it was intended, sweetheart.”

 

Daria sighed as she left the kitchen.

 

 

Saturday came too quickly as far as Daria was concerned. Then there was the fact that she realised that she had a crush on Jane’s brother, Trent. ‘He’s too old!’ she thought as they pulled up outside Crewe Neck.

 

“I’ll let you off here. I have a problem dealing with authority,” Trent said.

 

“Sure, you don’t want to crash?” Jane asked.

 

“A high school party? Please. Don’t you think I’m a little mature for that?” Trent responded. “Besides, I don’t have a surfboard.”

 

Daria and Jane got out of the car.

 

‘Don’t do anything I wouldn’t,” Trent said before driving away.

 

“Bye,” Daria said.

 

“Nice conversational skills.”

 

“I hate you.”



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